Writing Support Resources

Sample BAD Paragraph

I hate wet and reiny days.

It rained a lot in 1816.... a lot - like everyday; the weather in Europe was abnormally wet because it rained in Switzerland on 130 out of the 183 days from April to September. If I was Mary Shelley I might decide to write a book too, or at least some social media posts. Afterall, it was the onnly thing you could do without cellphones or TV or anything. Sounds sooooo boring! She said that she "passed the summer of 1816 in the environs of Geneva...we occasionally amused ourselves with some German stories of ghosts... These tales excited in us a playful desire of imitation"  So, people were stuck inside and bored. Mary Shelley decided to write a book becuase it was so awful outside. I can totally see her point, you know? I guess I would go crazy if there was nothing else to do besides look out at the rain n read.

What's BAD about it?

• The opening sentence is not on target, and it has a spelling error.
• The second sentence states a fact, but no cited source is provided - plagiarism!
• The rest of the paragraph begins to discuss the topic, but not clearly enough to allow the audience to see where you are heading.
• The quote used does little to support the opening sentences.
• Grammar errors  and run on sentences are present as well.
• Spelling Errors
• First person use - in academic writing take ME and I out, and rewrite the sentence so that those "first person" words are not needed (see sample GOOD paragraph)
• The topic is what motivated Mary Shelly to write Frankenstein? The reader is introduced to the writer not liking rain, but is that the main topic of this?  No, the topic is why Mary Shelly wrote Frankenstein.
• See sample GOOD paragraph to see how the quote was used more effectively there.